Would you ever consider writing a letter to a body part that was giving you trouble, or to an illness? Or have that body part or illness write a letter to you? Pretty weird, right?
Actually, not so weird. Letters are a wonderful therapeutic journaling technique, particularly the Unsent Letter. This technique is just what it sounds like: you write a letter you will never send. Keeping it personal allows you to express yourself honestly. And, if for some reason you really never want anyone else ever see it, you can destroy it.
When I was facilitating journaling groups for people with brain injury, participants sometimes wrote an Unsent Letter. Everyone knows what a letter is, and they were able to use it well, sometimes in profound ways. They would write a letter to their brains, delivering a message, such as “I’m sorry I didn’t protect you better,” or asking questions, including “Why did this terrible injury happen to you?” When they shared their letters with the group, we often were deeply touched, sometimes to the point of tears.
Because we are living, breathing Stories, we are embodied Stories—we hold within our physical selves everything we have experienced through our thoughts, feelings, emotions, and beliefs, and this process creates our experience of reality. So if we pay close attention to our bodies—if we listen to them with the “ear of our heart” as St. Benedict might say—we can access the vast storehouse of wisdom held within them. This revealed wisdom can help us heal and live in a more joyful, positive way.
When I had breast cancer six years ago, I wrote both to my breast and to the small tumor there. This exercise allowed me to explore my feelings about the situation, and it was immensely helpful for my emotional state, which I am sure enhanced my physical well-being too. Dealing with recent health issues has once again caused me to listen more closely to what my body is trying to tell me with the changes it has manifested. So, I’ve been writing letters to and from my thyroid. Some enlightening information has emerged, and I know it will help me restore my good health.
How to write an Unsent Letter? First, know that you can write a letter to anyone—living or not, real or imaginary—or anything. Perhaps you need to vent your anger or displeasure with someone but do not want to express it to them (letting it all out in a letter you will never send can sometimes clarify your thoughts, so that you can write another, send-able letter to the person or have a conversation minus the anger). Or perhaps the person is no longer in your life or you don’t know how to reach them, yet you have something important to tell them. You can write such a letter to a part of yourself, say your Procrastinator self or your 10-year-old or future 80-year-old self—or write it from that part to you. Or perhaps you have an illness or injury and have a desire to tell or ask it something. The Unsent Letter is perfect for all of these situations, and many more.
Now I’m that exploring this new health issue, as I write and meditate, my body’s deep wisdom is slowly emerging and allowing me to discover information I can use to become more positive about the situation, or perhaps even to heal it.
FOR YOUR JOURNAL
I invite you to write an Unsent Letter to a person, a situation, or anything in your life with which you would like to express yourself. Be as honest and sincere as you can, keep your pen moving, and trust that the right words will come. (No one will see this except for you, remember.) Begin with “Dear ____________” and be sure to end with a closing such as “Sincerely,” “Love,” or whatever you feel is appropriate, followed by your name.